Rational - The Bloody Nipple Saga

The common trend these days seems to have players slide towards the snarky comments. There's even a video game that uses it as a gimmick. But, in real life, there's only so much snark that a GM can take. Cross that line, and characters turn into small piles of dust. Players should also be warned that, should said snark continue, the players turn up as small piles of dust, too (but that pushes a gaming session into a LARP).

For those who didn't catch it, Tom (who plays Valeria) quotes MacBeth, Act 2. It's a bit out of character for him to snark, but he just can't help to throw out a Shakespeare reference. I almost had him make a Henry V reference in a previous comic, but I left that to the title.

I had to look these locations up on a Hyborean map to check the spelling. It should also give you an idea where the movie takes place in that world.

This comic is on the small side, to make up for the next comic (which is going to be quite large - about 1.3 MB).

Transcript:

Scene: Valeria, Conan, and Subotai stand before King Osric, surrounded by guards.

DM:Look. Guys. I know it's all fun, but can you at least contain yourselves long enough to let me get through this speech?

Subotai:Oh, alright. I'll let it go this time.

DM:You're so considerate.

King Osric (DM):Snakes in my beautiful city. To the West - Nemedia, Aquilonia. To the South - Koth, Stygia. Snakes! Everywhere these evil towers. You alone have stood up to their gods, and what are you? Thieves!

Conan:But I'm not a...

Subotai:Hush. You'll get us all in trouble.

King Osric (DM):Do you see this?

Valeria:Is that a dagger I see before me?

DM:That's it.

Subotai:I dive for cover!

DM:Everyone, roll to save versus lightning and meteors.